Remember my name?

Posted by By at 22 October, at 15 : 17 PM Print



Where do ex-Prime Ministers go when the curtain comes down and they need to fill their egos? In particular, where would a former Prime Minister go to impose his or her will on the rest of Australia?

The likely scenario for Kevin Rudd is that he takes up a post with the United Nations. The UN is the perfect organisation for Mr Rudd as he keeps company with a host of big talking, do-nothing bureaucrats. It’s easy to talk about human rights abuses such as those in Syria, without taking a hard line approach. It’s even easier to blame the US for anything that happens when UN policy fails. It’s the perfect position for an ex-politician. But that’s another story.

There is another post-high office option for Mr Rudd. My guess is that he will replace Charlie Pickering as the host of The Project or he’ll be given his own show.

In the final weeks of the election campaign, Mr Rudd appeared several times on The Project. If it was anyone else, we may have been tricked into thinking this was a PR stunt designed to illustrate the humorous side of a battling PM. Yet, perhaps there is more to this.

Mr Rudd has been on so many Roving Enterprise shows (including Rove) it is easy to postulate that, post-Prime Ministership, he will be angling for his own talk show.

With 1.3 million Twitter followers, 90,000 likes on Facebook and 50,000 followers on Instagram, those figures could translate to TV audiences and Channel 10 (the likely network for Mr Rudd’s style of self love) would have a ratings heavyweight and prime time advertisers clamouring to spend their bucks.

Tonight Live with Kevin Rudd has a nice ring, The Daily Show with Kevin Rudd or perhaps just his Christian name: Ellen, OprahKevin. If he wanted something with a little irony, Don’t you know who I am? would make a great title for a TV show.

Let’s set the scene:

Kevin walks into the spotlight with a flick of his hair, squints into the lights and proceeds to deliver a half hour monologue. His first guest would be Tony Abbott. His first question reflects on his time as PM and Mr Abbott’s opposition. After about five minutes in which the question is still being formulated, Mr Abbott looks into the camera and asks, “Does this man ever shut up?”

The applause sign starts flickering, the live audience claps and cheers and Mr Rudd flicks his hair back, smiles and proceeds to finish the question.

Angry at being upstaged, Kevin goes backstage during an ad break, abuses the make-up artist and throws his non-vegetarian tray of sandwiches to the floor.

His next guest is Rove. Rove fawns. Kevin is back on track…

 

Excerpted from an article originally published in the Nov/Dec 2013 issue of Think & Grow Rich Inc. magazine. If you are a subscriber to Think & Grow Rich Inc. magazine, you will receive this article in your Nov/Dec 2013 issue of TGR. If you are not a subscriber, click here to subscribe.

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